Perhaps, I am a blooming flower.

Today, I felt like an autumn leaf, falling into a graveyard of those like me.

My colour, drained. The intimate relationship with the tree, severed. Changes were through and I was at the end of my cycle, left to decompose into the soil.

Or, perhaps, I am a blooming flower.

Today, I felt like the fir needles in the dead of winter.

Carrying more the weight of the snow, heavier each day, becoming more than I could bear. I do not grow, nor change. I am simply the fir needle, residing on my branch, consistent.

Or, perhaps, I am a blooming flower.

Today, I felt like the resting grass, lifeless and dark.

Laying flatly with heavy snow and ice weighing on my shoulders. Growth and life not for me for many coming months. Meant to reside beneath the frost.

Or, perhaps I am a blooming flower.

Today, I felt like the chickadee, picking at the seeds.

Cold, and busy. Grateful for the gifts I find in the barren winter. Rustling around for shelter.

Today, I felt like a blooming flower.

Unsure, and unprepared. Change upon me like a cleansing storm. My growth still coming for me. The pain of breaking through the ice still present. But the promise of beauty and sunshine to come.

I am all of these things:

The autumn leaf.

The fir needle.

The grass.

The chickadee.

The blooming flower.

For each of Mother Earth’s gifts feels pain, challenges their own strength and endures much, before seeing the spring sunshine, and encouraging the growth of tomorrow. The barren winter puts a heavy burden on nature’s shoulders. But I will grow amoung it and sprout through the cold dirt until I find the golden glimmer of sun, and I will reach for that, until I bud on the branch. Until the snow melts away. Until I breathe and grow through the dirt. Until I fly through spring breezes. Until I bloom.

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Change.

We are officially, here where I am on Mother Earth, 9 hours into the new year. 2019.

I have never been a “new year, new me” kinda gal. The only new years resolution I ever made was my choice to become vegetarian (4 years ago, today). But I sense a shift. The entire paradigms of my life have shifted.

Truly this year will have an eternal impact on the following days of my life. These changes are also uncomfortable. Painful. Forced upon me. But it puts me on the cusp of growth. These things occur for us to grow. So, growth is in my cards. Painful, challenging growth.

I feel like a tree, on the first bitter cold days of winter. Nothing for shelter, but my own branches. Much like a tree, I believe the cold winter will end, and in my time my leaves will bud and grow. And I will flourish again.

In these times, I put on my muddy boots. I wrap myself in my winter shawl, and I crawl deep into the woods for comfort and guidance.

Growth is hard. Growth is beautiful. I am grateful to have summited the mountain. From here we will feel love and we will flourish.

We all must endure a little suffering in the name of growth. I embrace this change, the alterations coming to my life, and I am blessed to feel all these emotions so deeply. I am ready for what is to come. My heart is open. Perhaps it is time to let my wild heart free.

May you all feel love, blessings and joy in the coming days.

Today, I will hold the cedar branches. Breathe the forest air, and let my heart feel. To let the trees speak their magic to me.

Love, and blessings. If you are also feeling this inclinations to change, come warm your feet by the fire, here with me. If nothing else, you will find here a tree, relying on her branches. A woman who is also here to warm her feet. A transformation waiting to happen.

Pictured is my love and I, just a few days after our holiday celebrations. Out enjoying the beautiful winter day.

Simple thoughts.

Good day, to all.

Today, I have things on my heart. We approach the celebration of the new year, and though I intend to stay warm by the fire, tea in my hands, warms socks, and my love by my side, staring out at the cedar trees, I still hope for things to come in the new year. For opportunities, changes and blessings.

My soul has always longed for many unusual things. I require the presence of the trees just to simply function, and I’ve always longed for exploration, for places I’ve never been, for travel. Above all, i have forever longed to visit Ireland.

My maternal family is from Ireland beginning a few generations before my own. And the stories I’ve heard have resonated with me throughout my whole life. The hills, the forests, the Faerie rings. The stone cottages and homely Irish pubs. It’s forever been the top of my travel to-do list, but has somehow always been pushed aside for some life happening or another. I love a simple life. Taking joy in the cozy home atmosphere, enjoying the company of locals and small town life. I grew up playing on my grandfather’s farm, and enjoyed the presence of the animals and the slow life of childhood on the farm. I’d choose a night at my favourite pub with good food and my favourite beer, or a night at home with my love and a book by the fire, accompanied by tea or a beer, before I’d ever choose a night on the town, a busy city-style life. Going always, rushing always. I admire the slow life, and the slow life on an Irish countryside is my heart’s desire.

Perhaps it’s the coming of the new year. Perhaps it’s that my love and I are experiencing some major things in our lives, or perhaps it’s that my love and I are getting married in the coming summer, and a honeymoon is a beautiful excuse to travel. But whatever the reason may be, I find myself longing for Ireland more than ever. Dreaming of sitting in a pub, side by side with my dearest love, talking about the joys of the day. Touring a castle, visiting a library, trying the local foods (However I’ve heard it rumored that it’s hard to be a vegetarian tourist in Ireland, apparently most restaurants serve primarily local meats. I know not) I fantasize about staying in a sweet B’n’B, or talking to locals at the market. I spend my time looking at flight costs for the time in which we’d be traveling. Or making lists of where I’d love to go.

For whatever reason, this ache has been in my heart since the earliest days of girlhood. And has stayed a burning passion into my adult life. And I feel as though it is a craving that will only be satisfied by spending my time on the Irish hills.

It’s strange to feel as though your heart belongs somewhere else. The culture of my homeland is not at all the culture of my heart. And though I’ve forever been unusual and rarely meet people I can be my true self with, it still gets exhausting. I love many humans. And though I find, despite my oddities, I get along well with many, I deeply connect with few. And perhaps it is my mind simply creating a “grass is greener” scenario, but I feel as though my heart calls me home. To a place where my connections will be deeper. If not with the humans, than certainly with Mother Earth.

I am eternally grateful, as my love feels the same callings. He feels the deep need to travel through Ireland, and Scotland. And he longs to hold my hand as we walk through their streets. And he feels deeply unusual as well, we bond over many things. And I have him as my true best friend. Maybe, we just need to satisfy the craving, and we will realise where or home truly is. Whether it be here or not.

Is it unusual to ache and long so deeply for a place I’ve never seen? For air I’ve never breathed, and hills I’ve never stood upon? Have any of you felt this?

I have no idea what our year will bring. What our marriage will hold for these two unusual fae folk, living in a hectic modern world. But I choose to take the opportunities as blessings and strengths. We shall find joy, and peace.

May you all have a blessed New Year, and may you feel immense joy and blessings as the season of celebrations comes to a close.

Blessings ,

Carly.

Blessed Winter Solstice.

Good day, all!

Here, in the northern hemisphere of Mother Earth, we are experiencing the longest day of the year. Darkness encompasses us, the swirls of winters breath, and the gentle snow.

I have truly felt darkness, this solstice. Hardship, coldness and struggle. But I am really blessed. Only a matter of days before the light comes again. And I’m choosing to use the darkness to expose deep blessings and earthly magic.

As a Canadian-living sprite, I am no stranger to long winters, as my home is infamous for being cold, and wintery, and the hide of our citizens thick and warm. I, however am much more the hibernating type, only to come out on the joyous days of fresh, sparkling snow, the sun creeping out if it’s own hibernation. However, the solstice comes around every year and I forever seem to be caught off guard by the darkness.

Much like Mother Earth, we as living things go through cycles of light and darkness, and we need both things to survive. It is easy to blame the cold, hard winters. To see darkness and to succumb to it.

I am challenging myself to feel blessed, even through my own life’s solstice. The darkest night. To see the bright stars, and hear the creatures roam. To enjoy the silence of the creatures resting. There is so much to appreciate in darkness, and I challenge myself to count the blessings.

Tonight, I sit curled in blankets, drinking coffee and wrapping festive gifts, my love seated not far from me, chatting about his day. How much more blessed could I be?

May you see your blessings among your darkness. Blessed winter solstice.

In the season of the holidays, I hope your celebrations with your loved ones are joyous.

An introduction

Hey! Welcome, come on in! 

Warm your feet by the hearth of my heart. Sit for a cup of tea and fresh bread. 

This here, is a place for my friends. 

I will begin by simply stating my intentions here. 

I believe in magic of sorts. There is power in a walk in the forest, stepping barefoot in the grass, stopping to smell the flowers, the conifers, and to listen to the critters going about their day. And I’m here to share the stories of the magic I encounter. To listen to your stories! To have a hypothetical cottage in the woods where you stop in after a weary hike for aged cheese and fresh baked bread, and tell of your travels. I’m also here to offer advice and to search for it. 

A few things you may need to know about me: 

I am a young woman, passionate about many things. A daydreamer, a forest nymph, an artist, an experimenter, a vegetarian who likes food way more than I should, and a strong believer in the power of positivity. 

I foresee myself speaking plentifully about my vegetarian trials, errors, successes and frustrations. To share lessons, give reviews and recommendations. I also expect to share many of my unusual thoughts and outlooks on modern life, including my experiences in the magic forests, my dreams, my ecological concerns, hopes and efforts, and of course the wandering and dreams of my heart. 

If you are looking for order, organization and structure, I warn you, this will not be the place for you. As I have a chaotic and magical mind full of a hobbit’s dreams. If you also, are a magical creature living in a mundane world, then take your shoes off, sit down and grab a blanket. Here will be a cozy place for you. 

I implore any visitors to stop in for a while and enjoy a cuppa. For I hope to provide magic to all of Earth’s fine beings. 

So please, drop in and stay a while! And make a home here if you wish. 

May you all have a warm and blessed day.